Thursday, December 21, 2006

Shakti state of mind

Over the last few months, I've been spending increasingly long hours in front of the computer. To keep myself going, I always have some music playing in the background. Alongside my expertise in analog circuit design, my breadth of knowledge in music has increased significantly too.

And as I have discovered, I go through very distinct phases, or "flavour of the month" if you may. The flavour of this month is Shakti. Over the next few weeks, I'll try to put into words what appeals to me in the music that I listen too. But for now, here's a Shakti video. Yenzzaai !

Saturday, November 05, 2005

The Solitary

The Solitary

When my crickets chirp,
At night, on the late-burning hearth,
Then I can sit down with a contented mind,
Cosily by the fire,
so easy, so free from care.

A dear, silent little hour
One gladly spends awake by the fire;
When the flame sinks, one pokes
The sparks into life, and ponders and thinks:
Well, one more day!

Whatever love or sorrow
Has brought to us in the course of the day;
This passes once more through the mind;
But the evil one casts away,
It must not disturb the night.

For a happy dream
One gently prepares oneself,
And when, carefree, a sweet image
Fills the soul with gentle joy
One gives oneself over to rest.

Oh how content I am with myself
In my quiet country ways!
That which in the bustle of the noisy world,
Holds the wandering heart in fetters
Does not give contentedness.

Chirp on and on, dear cricket,
In my small and narrow room,
I tolerate you gladly: you do not disturb me,
When your song breaks the silence
I am not wholly alone

In a lot of ways, I was experiencing these sentiments while I was typing out this song (which btw, is a translation from a German song called Der Einsame by karl Gottlieb Lappe) .
It is a Friday night around 1 am, very very quiet . Its raining outside and I can hear the raindrops on my window pane. And I have just finished another hectic week.

Friday, January 14, 2005

Texas Trip - I

The following piece is plagiarized from Shivaram's blog . I have been wanting to write about my trip down south, but if something is available readymade, American common-sense demands that it be immediately used instead of taking the trouble yourself. At a later stage, I'll check if Vishal has kept a log of my visit to Dallas. Otherwise, I'll write "Texas trip - II" myself :-)

Gandhi and Mammo came to Austin during the Christmas break, and we spent the good part of a week visiting places in and around Austin, and also went to San Antonio and Dallas. I enclose an account of the time we spent together.

I'm at the Austin Bergstrom terminal, waiting for Mammo's arrival. I look forward to meeting him; after all, I've been away from the 'chaps' for a while. Mammo arrives, all smiles, gliding down the escalator. We shake hands, and the spell is broken. As we sit in the airport lounge waiting for Gandhi's flight to arrive from San Jose, we trade notes on our respective lives as grad-students, Boston and Austin, India and America, etc. Then Gandhi arrives, wearing a brown leather jacket. I tell him it's unnecessary, because the blasted cold weather of the past few days has suddenly, as if by magic (or, as Mammo would claim, by virtue of his arrival!), given way to fair winds and sunny skies.

We take a taxi back home, and the driver takes us through a surprising short-cut. I tip her heavily, and don't mind having paid her more than I would have had she not taken the short cut. I wish her 'Merry Christmas,' and she is happy.

Gandhi, Mammo, and I would never have imagined we'd one day find ourselves in a kitchen, in front of a stove, attempting to cook food. But here we are today, grad-students and all, preparing with our own hands our nourishment. We only attempt to make Maggi, but a gooey broth too many cooks have spoilt results. We later learn that Gandhi did not know that water had to be added according to a prescribed proportion.

Lingo stays a couple of blocks away, and we decide to pay him a visit. His brother, who bears him an uncanny resemblance, is visiting. Gandhi and Lingo have much to discuss, while Mammo and I, for the most part, listen.

* * *

We are at the bus terminal, waiting in line for the bus that'll take us to San Antonio. The bus is two hours late, and we are surprised that nobody in the queue threatens to sue the service. Some people are restive, but our Indian years have prepared us rather well to cope with the delay. When we finally board the bus, it is only a matter of minutes before Gandhi and Mammo both fall asleep. As I look out of the window, I see for the first time since I arrived in Texas, its famous cows and horses. But there are no ranches like ones in the movies; in fact, I don't get to see more than five cows or two horses at any given time!We reach San Antonio.

* * *

We are by the famed river walk by late evening, and the place lives up to its fame. The river walk, built around a network of canals, is a thriving area for colourful people, colourful open air Mexican restaurants, and colourful Mexican food. The unconquerable joy of weaving in and out of a sea of humanity, celebrating something as simple as life, becomes ours. And even as we begin to gorge quesadillas and enchiladas at the Casa Rio, a Mariachi band strikes up, adding music to music.

The next morning we set out to visit the Alamo, a fortress where several treacherous battles are said to have been fought. We have difficulty finding the place, and ask an old man crossing the road along with us where the Alamo may be. He points to the same building in front of which we stand, one that had better not be described as anything more fancy than a run-down house. The 'fort' looks about as impressive as an Indian police station, and we decide not to inconvenience our cameras clicking away at so dull a specimen.

We head to the River Walk again, and this time perch ourselves on a boat that gives a guided tour around the place. We imbibe the interesting parts of the history of the place, as much as we let our eyes feast on beautiful people along the walk. We grab ourselves food at an Italian restaurant, and Gandhi and I buy ourselves straw hats. Gandhi does look impressive, and Mammo tells me I look like a Mexican immigrant!We head back to Austin, where we spend the night talking.

* * *

The next day we are joined by Lisa and Eric on a boat ride. We are at Lake Travis, situated a couple of tens of miles north and west of Austin. The ride to Lake Travis from my house cuts through hilly terrain, and is beautiful. Eric informs us that here's where the rich of Austin build their houses.We get into a 'speed-boat' and take turns driving it. The ride is exciting, and it feels nice to skim over the surface of the water at high speeds.

We visit Oasis, the famous Tex-Mex restaurant by the lake, for an evening meal. This place is also called the 'Sunset Capital' of Texas, and we are indeed lucky to find the sun taking its time to set over the lake as we make our up the cliff overhanging it. As I walk back to the restaurant, where our meals must by now be ready, a couple of little girls approach me with a digital camera and wonder if I could oblige them with a picture. They grin excitedly as I take the picture, and are very happy with the result. I'm not surprised they are, for I think they are even prettier than the setting sun!

* * *

We are in Dallas, and Mammo has to part ways. But we still manage to find time to sneak into a south Indian restaurant, and help ourselves to enormous helpings of pongal and vadai and sambar. With stomachs full, Gandhi and I finally say goodbye to Mammo, and ourselves proceed to the 'Sixth Floor,' the sixth floor of a building on Elm Street purportedly from where Lee Harry Oswald gunned down John Kennedy. We pour over the exhibits and information provided at the 'JFK Museum.' It seems that there is more to the killing than is widely known about it--the museum provides an interesting perspective. We also peek through the very window overlooking Houston Street and Dealy Plaza through which the bullets are said to have been fired, but today one can only see excited tourists and fast cars as one looks from this window. We bump into a fellow outside the building, who, with his own set of pictures and newspaper articles, is attempting to convince bystanders that he has proof Lyndon Johnson and other rich industrialists eager to amplify their profits during the Vietnam War were responsible for Kennedy's assassination. We nod our heads, leave his stall, and then stop nodding our heads.

Monday, November 15, 2004

First Snow

I am a subscriber to this online poetry forum called Minstrels, where I receive a poem by mail almost everyday. The poem I received on 12th November goes like this :

People

No people are uninteresting.
Their fate is like the chronicle of planets.

Nothing in them is not particular,
and planet is dissimilar from planet.

And if a man lived in obscurity
making his friends in that obscurity
obscurity is not uninteresting.

To each his world is private,
and in that world one excellent minute.

And in that world one tragic minute.
These are private.

In any man who dies there dies with him
his first snow and kiss and fight.
It goes with him.

There are left books and bridges
and painted canvas and machinery.
Whose fate is to survive.

But what has gone is also not nothing:
by the rule of the game something has gone.
Not people die but worlds die in them.
-- Yevgeny Yevtushenko

The poem itself if very beautiful and it concurs with my philosophy, but what makes it all the more special is that it mentions "his first snow" . By a strange coincidence, I DID experience my first snow-fall on the same day I got this poem in my mailbox!! There is something magical about "the first snow". Its biting cold, yet you want to venture out and play with the snow flakes. Others around you will have their umbrellas open, but you won't be able to get yourself to open yours. There's an inexplicabe elation. The poet could not have been more correct. I'm now waiting for my first kiss ;-)

Thursday, November 11, 2004

wow...its 3 degrees POSITIVE today

Just a week of cold, and I find myself undergoing a paradigm shift. My defintions of cold and pleasant have changed. I really surprised myself when I looked at weather.com,before leaving my office for home , and when I saw that its 3 degrees, I said to myself, "Wow ! Its pleasant outside today" . Soon I was wondering if it actually went down to 3 in Calcutta, what would the reaction of the city be. The baboo would be convinced that doomsday is here !

The last 2-3 days have been cold. The maimum has been 3-4 degrees and the minimum -4 or -5. And I have been working late at nights, so I invariably end up walking back home at around 3-4 am , when the cold is at its worst. Somehow, I actually enjoy it. Its a new experience. I am just waiting to see snow, and I realise that the wait isn't going to be too long. The past week though cold has been very clear, but by law of averages, it rains at least once a week, so maybe the next time when it gets overcast, it wont rain, but snow!

I also realise that this is Diwali time, but strangely I dont feel the need to be a part of the festivities. I think its good...otherwise I would end up feeling like shit. Whoever is reading this - wish you a happy Diwali.





Pather Panchali

Its quite a shame that I end up watching a Bengali masterpiece like Pather Panchali, in the US, surrounded by people who barely understand the society and struggle that this movie portrays, let alone the language. Ironically, I think I enjoyed the movie more here than I would watching it at home.

Well, the movie IS a masterpiece. Some critics might say that it is too slow. Yes, it is slow, but I feel it has deliberately been kept slow. Also, some people are restless. Others, like me, relish it when time moves slowly. So it definitely wasn't too slow for me.

What made the movie special ? The simplicity and ubiquitousness of the theme. It is an ordinary story of ordinary people, just narrated in an extra-ordinary way. This in my opinion is the hallmark of a good story-teller. It is the story of family in a village facing the vicissitudes of fortune. Plenty of movies have been made on this general theme, but what makes this special is (a) the picturization and (b) the ability to to make one empathize without resorting to melodrama.

The picturization is just brilliant. The scenes that will be etched in my mind for some time are the candy-man, durga, apu, and dog scene and the scene where Durga and Apu play hide and sike around a dilapidated wall. See it and you'll know what I'm talking about.

The reason this movie was all the more special to me was because of a feeling of association. Sitting here in the US, there is hardly anything with which you feel an immediate connection. For once, I truly understood the characters, the colloquilisms and the setting. There's something about rural Bengal which is really magical. Rural Andhra or rural Orissa isn't the same. I speak out of my experience on the Howrah-Madras route. I always knew it by the scenery when we entered Bengal.

Finally, the scene of the water bugs darting about in the pond : it made me nostalgic about my IIT days. Actually, I get nostalgic about IIT at the drop of a hat , but this was different. I remeber one fine winter morning in Chennai when Shivaram and I decided to go explore the IIT lake area in order to prepare for the "Nature Lovers' trek" that we were organizing during Saarang. We ended up accidently noticing these same water-bugs on the IIT lake, and were awe-struck by nature's beauty that manifested itself as these timy bugs moving absolutely randomly on the water surface. I dont know what was the purpose of that scene in the movie, but it was definitely a statement about Satyajit Ray's idea of beauty . I wonder how many urbanites have seen these water-bugs ?

Saturday, October 16, 2004

Week - 9th Oct to 16th Oct

Well, my imagination is not at its best now and thus the very simple and functional title for this entry. (Its just too difficult to come up with interesting names for uninteresting weeks!). The highpoint of this week were - a)the hiking trip and b)the setting up of my room.

On Saturday morning, I met Sheila didi and we had breakfast together. She is a very interesting person and I enjoyed our conversation. I like her field of study and we primarily spoke of things related to it. On my way back I bought my bed frame and lugged it back to my apartment. I then started the day-long process of setting up my room. It took a lot of time to get everything in place, but by the end of it, I was very pleased by the way my room looked. It is a nice, cosy, comfortable room now with a bed, a side table, a study desk, a book shelf and a high back leather chair. In the course of the day I also ended up going to a mall in the suburbs to buy my quilt, chair etc. The drive was quite scenic and I got my first taste of "fall colours". The trees turn uniformly yellow, orange, red, pink, maroon and and all shades in between. Its quite magical.

On Sunday, I went hiking with 3 others.: Soumyajit, a DBPC senior now at MIT, Stuart (who is Soumyajit's friend) and Antara (who is Soumyajit's family friend and now doing a PhD in history at Harvard). We went to Mt. Monadnock in New Hampshire which is a 2 hour drive from Boston. Soumyajit owns a car and he drove us there. It was an enjoyable trek - though quite demanding. The ascent is 600m in 2 miles. Most of the trail is very rocky and there is always the danger of getting a twisted ankle if one is not careful enough. There aren't any life threatening dangers like the ones in the Uttaranchal area. It was great fun getting to know these people and we were enjoying our climb. We were about 500 m from the summit when Antara's knee cap dislocated! I don't think it was her carelessness or anything, but she was plain unlucky. For 10 minutes she was in severe pain, but then miraculously it popped back again into its place. But by then the Mountain rangers had arrived and they gave her whatever medical help she required. We abandoned the idea of reaching the summit because there was no way Antara could climb any further. She was still not able to bend her knee and the 2 mountain rangers decided to go all the way to the bottom with her, providing her with expert guidance and support to climb down roughly 3 kms with a bad knee !! We had a pretty leisurely walk the way down because the pace was set by her. It was quite enjoyable (though I cant say the same for her). So finally we reached the base camp and headed back. To speak the truth, I was not very disappointed at not reaching the summit. We all had a nice time and that we actually missed was a good scenic view from the top (and a sense of achievement!) . One of the mountain rangers was actually the Dean at Brown University (which is an internationally reputed university) who did this work as a hobby on weekends ! By the time we reached Cambridge, it was 9 pm and we were all quite tired.

Monday was a holiday and I spent the day recovering from my trip and looking at my assignments for the week. Since I did not go the university and both my room mates were out of town for work, I spent the whole day without actually uttering a word! It was ok for one day, but anymore than that, and I would have gone into depression !! Tuesday, Wenesday and Thursday just whizzzed past and all I did was work. I finally got a breather on Friday evening. I went to see Antara in her hostel to see how her knee was healing. The hostels are quite decent though the rooms are quite small. Maybe I'll try to move into them next year. I like my apartment a lot and it will be a tough decision. I dont know . Its too early to be thinking about it anyways. After that, I went to a "Bollywood" party organized at one of the hostels' common room. I did not enjoy myself too much. At American parties, all you do is make small-talk with others, something that doesn't go down too well with me. They were playing hindi film song videos and I was surprised to see so many "non-Indians" enjoying them. I came back at around 11, walking in the rain (Mummy, I had an umbrella so dont get worried) . Upon reaching home, I made myself a hot cup of Bournvita, made myself cozy in my razai, played some Kishore Kumar songs and read some poetry. It felt so relaxing not to have a impending deadline screaming at you.

Well that was the week. In general my lifestyle here is quite different from my IIT lifestyle and I dont think a change of location has much to do with it. There are suddenly more responsibilities. I make a mental note if I see the stove slightly dirty or paper napkins running out. I guess its the natural process of growing up. I dont know whether I prefer this or the carefree, almost careless Ankur, loitering about in the B2 wing of Alakananda Hostel, IIT Madras.

Friday, October 08, 2004

another week

Its been one helluva busy week. After yes-no-maybe-no-yes tinteretto, Ajit (aka Q, my IIT friend, who will be referred to as Q in the rest of this post) , Q finally made it to Boston. No sooner had he sat down on the couch than he received a phone call conveying the saddest news we had heard in some time. Our dear friend Pondie, (Narasimha Rao) met with a fatal accident. It was a big group going in a Tempo traveller to some nearby place, when a lorry hit them. He was the only unlucky person. Others escaped with fractures and sutures. It just reminds us all that we should not take life for granted. Pondie was a real lively guy who always looked forward to a new day. Its very unfair that, of all people, he should meet with such a fate.

Well, our spirits were considerably dampened, but we realised that there was absolutely nothing useful that we could do sitting in this distant country to help matters. Thus we decided to keep this aside as best as we could. I showed Q around Harvard. All along, we had a really nice conversation, meeting as we were after one year. For those of you who dont know, Q Parande and I spent the whole of last summer together. Q and I worked on similar BTP's , both of us were Shaastra events cores in our respective final years and in general we get alog pretty well. Of course, there's a lot more to Q ! So we had plenty to talk about. We watched some street performance at harvard square, browsed through books at the harvard book store. I bombarded him with all the trivia I knew about Harvard. In the evening we went for dinner with some of Q's batchmates who live in the Boston area. We went to a Bengali restaurant where I ate aloo-postu ! We were up till the wee hours discussing various things, but still we got up pretty early on Sunday because we had a long list of things to do. First, we decided to take some snaps of Harvard - for both his sake and mine. I'll be putting them up somewhere, soon . Then, we left for downtown Boston. This was my first time in the city too. The city is quite spectacular. Its a very healthy mix of heritage and modernity. A 70 storied skyscraper stands right next to a 150 yr old town hall. Everywhere its like that. Q, who has seen most other US cities said that he really liked Boston . Since I really cant compare it with anything, I'll merely say that I am happy to be living in this city. We took the famous freedom trail, which a 3 km walk through the city's oldest areas. In the afternoon, we went for a musical play. Q is a big follower of this composer called Stephen Sondheim and this musical was written by Sondheim. Indeed Sondheim creates some lovely songs. After that we went to meet Q's MIT Media lab friend, Vijay. He showed s around the campus and then we went to an Algerian (!!) restaurant for dinner. The food was very different from anything I had eaten before, and it had a very typical taste to it. It was enjoyable. Overr dinner, we got talking about globalization, and its impacts. The discussion got extremely lively and we headed to Vijay's apartment to continue. We spent another couple of hours talking about societies, cultures, genes, insticts and what not. We finally came back home around mid night. Next morning Q had a flight at 8 am. These 2 days I got what I had missing for quite some time. The company of someone who is at the same wavelenght as I am. It had been a long time since I had had stimulating debates about issues. It had been a long time since I had gushed on the almost sensual pleasure of engineering. Long time since I used IIT lingo. It felt really good being Mammo for a couple of days, rather than Ankur.

A weekend of enjoyment implied a tortorous week ahead - and guess what - the week lived up to its expectations. There was one deadline on Wednesday, 2 on Thursday and 1 more on Friday and I was yet to start working on any of them. Thus I pushed myself as hard as I could and tried to tackle them. I was decently successful I think. It just meant not having a full peaceful night's sleep any of the nights. Not that I didnt sleep enough - only that lots of things were going on in my head even when I was sleeping. The only things worth mentioning are - a mini dbpc reunion I had with 2 other dbpc seniors here and my improving sambhar cooking skills.

This weekend I plan to go on a shopping spree and hopefully meet Sheila didi. Somehow we are never able to actually make it
thats all for now